Lately, I keep standing in front of mirrors, looking at my reflection with a bit of a hesitation. Who is this person staring at me? The face seems familiar, but the personality always seems to elude me. She doesn't seem sad, she doesn't seem happy, she just seems absent. But I can see her, so how can she be absent?
A new year on the run, a ton of things too do, so little time to do it, and I just stand there - watching Netflix and self-destructing from my inability to make a move. To be honest, I am baffled. I know I have to move but I am not sure where I need to go - so I just stand here, with myself, unable to make a step. I've noticed some 'loner' vibes. I do nothing, and I tend to wanna stay at home, inside, by myself. And no matter how much time I spend with myself it doesn't seem enough. It's not my first time in a limbo, but every time it happens I still don't know how to handle it. There is the urgency, the voice that keeps me alert that says "wake up, your deadlines are here, you are destructing yourself, by yourself , wake up'. I know the voice is right, but I still can't move. I feel drained and a bit tired. It's a weird kind of tired, since I'm actually not doing anything to get me tired to begin with.
So who are you, I ask myself in the mirror every single day. What do you want? How can I wake you up? What do you need? I need an answer.
